Every day, we say words. Some words are new and creative, yet the majority are repetitive and habitual. Just pause for a second and think about some words you use every day.
- Love
- Hate
- Yes
- No
- Sorry
- Thanks
- Please
- Horrible
- Bad
- Good
- Beautiful…etc
You will use the word uncopyrightable for example, a lot less than you would use the words in the previous list. We need to understand that every single word we say is powerful, specially when it comes to words we use on a habitual basis.
Words that are habitual are a clear reflection of our subconscious conditioning. People who are conditioned to see the world as a beautiful place, a spectacular adventure, are a lot more inclined to use words such as good, love, or happy, than others who are conditioned to see the world as a harsh place where they need to survive. Those individuals would use words such as hate, bad, or no, more often.
The words that we say on a daily basis are the building stones of who are we currently are. Think about it.
If all I say is:
- No!
- Stop doing that!
- I hate this weather.
- My job is awful.
What image do I convey? Of course in this example, you will picture me as someone who is upset, frustrated, or negative.
Now what if all I say is:
- You can do it.
- Yes I can!
- What a beautiful day!
- My job is amazing!
What image do I convey now? Now the image gets a lot more positive doesn’t it?
There are 3 words we use every single day that we all need to eliminate or try to control:
1) No
Recent studies have found that the average one year old child would hear the word “ No “ more than 400 times a day.
In fact, According to the National Science Foundation, 80% of our thoughts on a daily basis are negative. Our thoughts are connected to what we say and how we feel.
Human beings are creative beings. Children would jump over sofas imagining themselves escaping some deadly lava, until someone says: “No! Stop that!”
The word no would limit our creative essence if we don’t use it properly.
Sometimes you have to use the word no, the problem happens when you always use it. The crazy thing is, I talked about this with so many different people, and I noticed that most of us don’t even notice how often we say some words.
When you say the word no, you are sending a negative message. Whether what you’re saying was meant to be positive or not, the word no is automatically processed as something negative.
I was talking to one of my friends about how the word “ No “ can be harmful and he was agreeing with every single thing I said. He was explaining to me how he wants to start saying positive words a lot more than negative words as I was opening a bag of chips. When I asked him if he wanted any, he replied:
“No! I’m full!”
Now what if instead of saying that he said:
“Thanks! I just ate actually.”
You see how by simply removing the word no, and adding a more positive word, the entire context would change.
The thing is, this word creates a bridge to other negative words. What do people usually say after they use the word no?
- No! I don’t want that.
- No I can’t do it.
- No I can’t afford it.
- No I am too tired.
If we simply stop saying this one single word, we will be preventing ourselves from saying further negative words. Instead, we can replace it with a positive word. I found that in a lot of situations, replacing the word no, with the word thanks can be very helpful just like the previous example.
2) Hate
Hate is a very powerful word. I want you to take a minute and think about something that you really hate. You will automatically be struck by unpleasant emotions. Those emotions are linked to the thoughts, and the thoughts are linked to the word. If you want to describe the emotions linked to what you thought about, the easiest answer would be: “I hate it.”
Every time you say that word you are exposing yourself to a powerful source of negativity. When you wake up one day, it’s raining and you hate it. Then you’re on your way to work, stuck in traffic and you hate it. Getting to the office to finish some paperwork that you hate. It all becomes a big negative chain.
Now for every action there’s a reaction. If the action of saying hate, creates negativity, then the action of saying love creates positivity. When you start saying the word love instead of hate, your perspective will start to change a lot.
You will wake up in the morning to the lovely smell of the rain. You will drive your car in traffic listening to an album that you love.
When we express hate, we are resonating with a hatred emotional level. There is a scale that measures the level of emotions we feel. They go from positive all the way down to the negative. In this illustration below, you can see that hatred is one of the most intense negative feelings, and that’s exactly why we need to free ourselves from it.
3) Try
If I tell you to write a blog, and you say that you’re going to try, you are going to start with the intention that might be able to write a blog, but you might also fail at it. From the moment you begin you started with probability and doubt, that’s why you said you’ll try.
When we stop using that word, we ensure that the initial doubt barrier is shut. When we start with the intention that we will find a way, not an obstacle, we begin to truly understand what we’re capable of doing.
When you say you’ll try, you are anticipating potential failure and setting up your automatic defensive mechanism.
Of course, in some occasions, you need to use that word, the problem arises when this word becomes a habitual repetitive mechanism. Every time you want to embark on a new journey, or dive into a new venture, you will say to yourself:
“I want to try doing it!”
But what if instead of that you say:
“I am going to do it!”
You can see that, by simply eliminating one word, your mindset can change dramatically. You will stop looking at the obstacles that might cause you to fail, and you will start focusing on the opportunities you have to grow and succeed.
When we start working towards a new goal, we are usually excited and encouraged at first. However, once we start facing problems and obstacles, we get discouraged. Instead of saying: “I will try to overcome it!” You should focus on saying “I will overcome it!”
“Don’t say you’re having a bad day, say you’re having a character building day.”
– Les Brown